How to Overcome the Fear of What Others Think About You

Having the fear of what others think about you is known as “Allodoxaphobia ” or social phobia. It is an intense fear of being watched or judged by others or excessively sensitive to the opinions and thoughts of others. What can be known as having an approval addiction.

I am one of those people.

God has been working with me on this subject for a while now. The bible calls it “having a fear of man”. But it’s not being scared of people, it’s being worried about what they think of you or your actions.

If you have read some of my other posts you would know that for 20 years I ran a restaurant that my parents owned. Those 20 years taught me a lot. And one of those things it taught me was to not fear man.

God made it perfectly clear that I was to put Him first above all things and not to worry about the things of this world. And I clearly wasn’t doing that.

FEARING PEOPLE’S OPINION OF ME

I had an employee that needed to be written up for something she was not doing despite all the verbal times I told her to do this particular thing.

Now I had the tendency to let people walk all over me. I didn’t know how to say no or give out orders without thinking or worrying about what the other person thought of me.

The devil is good at getting you to accept wrong thoughts. And in this case, I was afraid to tell this girl what she needed to be doing. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. I feared that she would quit or be angry at me.

But God tried to tell me that if I fail to do what I know is right, I am sinning. (James 4:17)

Ouch! That hurt me knowing that I was sinning by not telling her what she was doing wrong. So I wrote her up. And you know what? She didn’t quit or get mad at me. And even if she did I know that God would have sent me another employee to take her place. I was afraid for no reason.

WHAT JOYCE MEYERS HAS TO SAY

Joyce Meyers wrote several books on this topic. One of them is called The Approval Fix. In this book, she talks about the people who work for her in her ministry. She says this, “I had to learn to accept that some people will disapprove of me or of the things I do and to rest in the fact that God approves of me.”

Joyce is right. I need to rest in the fact that God approves of me. And it doesn’t matter what anybody else thinks.

OVERCOMING THE FEAR OF WHAT OTHERS THINK

So, unfortunately, this is not an overnight fix. You will need to ask God to give you the courage to obey what He is asking you to do. Whether that may be saying NO to someone or like in my case giving someone discipline. You will also need to ask for help in letting go of the approval of man.

It may take some time for you to learn how to let go of that fear. But praying about it and asking God to help you is key. He will show you how to let it go. And I promise you the more you face your fear with God’s help it will get easier to believe that it doesn’t matter what others think it only matters what God thinks.

Also knowing who you are in Christ, what you are to Him, is very important in dealing with approval addiction. You can read this post titled “What does God think of me” to help you understand how much God loves you and that he approves of you no matter what you have done or what you have been through.

And once you start to let go, God will become the most important person in your life instead of the people you are afraid of. What He thinks matters more than what others think.

CONCLUSION

Do you fear of what others think about you? Share your comments below if this topic sounds familiar to you. Let’s encourage one another! Please share this post if you know of someone who needs some encouragement. And if you enjoyed reading this article please consider subscribing to my email list in the box that says “join the rest ” to receive these posts in your inbox once a week!

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